Self-Inflicted Stab Wounds and Other Ways to Die

I have some morbid sensibilities. I know how I'd want to die if not peacefully in my sleep in old age. Heroin overdose. Drug overdoses seem the best way to die I think because you don't know your going to die and youre tripping hard and probably in some beautiful haze. Shooting yourself in the head is a gamble because some people do it wrong and end up living. I used to want to die of overeating because I love eating but that takes a long time and nobody wants their roof cut off so they can airlift your morbidly obese body out of your house with a whale crane. But I know that I would NOT f-ing stab myself over and over again like Artie Lange....what was that guy ON?! And the saddest part is he lived and probs did not want to. Now he's the depressed guy who stabbed himself.

NEW YORK (AP) - Artie Lange’s hospitalization earlier this week was reportedly a result of nine self-inflicted stab wounds in an apparent suicide attempt.

According to a New York Post Page Six source, the troubled comic and “Howard Stern Show” regular attempted to take his own life over the weekend. A law-enforcement source told the paper that his mother found him in his New York apartment on Saturday morning and frantically called 911.

Lange reportedly suffered six “hesitation wounds” and three deep plunges.

Lange underwent surgery and was saved despite severe bleeding.

Earlier this week, Howard Stern talked about Lange’s long battle with drug addiction, saying, “We all have our demons. Artie has given this show tremendous moments of great comedy. He’s a tremendous contributor. He is a good man. Don’t forget how great he is.”

As previously reported on AccessHollywood.com, Lange has been absent from the radio show in recent weeks, having left on an indefinite hiatus earlier in December.