Friday, March 12, 2010

Apes of Wrath Land at Beauty Bar on Saturday


Apes of Wrath is one of my favorite currently dwelling San Diego bands right now and Scarlett Symphony is on that list as well. Both bands are crazy energetic and supremely talented. I also like seeing shows at the Beauty Bar, great sound and a very elevated stage. Check em out!!

If tight intriquite pop punk and rock and roll are not your style then go over and booty dance all night at The Whistlestop. Booty Basement continues to be the premier night in San Diego for letting loose on the dance floor and getting your groove on to the top dance songs of all time!

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Super Exciting: Lilith Fair Lineup and they're stopping in SD!

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The Lilith Fair Lineup look so bad ass!!! My favorite band the Dixie Chicks have formed a temporary new band made up of the sisters in the band (so no Natalie Maines...sadly, but oh well). Also, San Diego favs Molly Jenson, Anya Marina and Ingrid Michaelson are going to be part of this 90's Women Celebration Fest. I'm glad they didn't puss out and gather some lame ladies that would make the corporate world happy. They've included some really exciting artists!!

Where to be During an Earthquake


Remember that stuff about hiding under a table or standing in a doorway?? Well, this guy has a completely reverse opinion. This is very interesting, different from what we were all taught.

Boy! Is this ever an eye opener. Directly opposite of what we've been taught over the years! I can remember in school being told to, "duck and cover" or stand in a doorway during an earthquake. This guy's findings is absolutely amazing. I hope we all remember his survival method if we are ever in an earthquake!! !

Please read this and pass the info along to your family members; it could save their lives someday!

EXTRACT FROM DOUG COPP'S ARTICLE ON THE: "TRIANGLE OF LIFE"

My name is Doug Copp. I am the Rescue Chief and Disaster Manager of the American Rescue Team International (ARTI), the world's most experienced rescue team. The information in this article will save lives in an earthquake.

I have crawled inside 875 collapsed buildings, worked with rescue teams from 60 countries, founded rescue teams in several countries, and I am a member of many rescue teams from many countries.

I was the United Nations expert in Disaster Mitigation for two years. I have worked at every major disaster in the world since 1985, except for simultaneous disasters.

The first building I ever crawled inside of was a school in Mexico City during the 1985 earthquake. Every child was under its desk. Every child was crushed to the thickness of their bones. They could have survived by lying down next to their desks in the aisles. It was obscene, unnecessary and I wondered why the children were not in the aisles. I didn't at the time know that the children were told to hide under something.

Simply stated, when buildings collapse, the weight of the ceilings falling upon the objects or furniture inside crushes these objects, leaving a space or void next to them. This space is what I call the "triangle of life". The larger the object, the stronger, the less it will compact. The less the object compacts, the larger the void, the greater the probability that the person who is using this void for safety will not be injured. The next time you watch collapsed buildings, on television, count the "triangles" you see formed. They are everywhere. It is the most common shape, you will see, in a collapsed building.

TIPS FOR EARTHQUAKE SAFETY

1) Most everyone who simply "ducks and covers" WHEN BUILDINGS COLLAPSE are crushed to death. People who get under objects, like desks or cars, are crushed.

2) Cats, dogs and babies often naturally curl up in the fetal position. You should too in an earthquake. It is a natural safety/survival instinct. You can survive in a smaller void. Get next to an object, next to a sofa, next to a large bulky object that will compress slightly but leave a void next to it.

3) Wooden buildings are the safest type of construction to be in during an earthquake. Wood is flexible and moves with the force of the earthquake. If the wooden building does collapse, large survival voids are created. Also, the wooden building has less concentrated, crushing weight. Brick buildings will break into individual bricks. Bricks will cause many injuries but less squashed bodies than concrete slabs.

4) If you are in bed during the night and an earthquake occurs, simply roll off the bed. A safe void will exist around the bed. Hotels can achieve a much greater survival rate in earthquakes, simply by posting a sign on The back of the door of every room telling occupants to lie down on the floor, next to the bottom of the bed during an earthquake.

5) If an earthquake happens and you cannot easily escape by getting out the door or window, then lie down and curl up in the fetal position next to a sofa, or large chair.

6) Most everyone who gets under a doorway when buildings collapse is killed. How? If you stand under a doorway and the doorjamb falls forward or backward you will be crushed by the ceiling above. If the door jam falls sideways you will be cut in half by the doorway. In either case, you will be killed!

7) Never go to the stairs. The stairs have a different "moment of frequency" (they swing separately from the main part of the building). The stairs and remainder of the building continuously bump into each other until structural failure of the stairs takes place. The people who get on stairs before they fail are chopped up by the stair treads - horribly mutilated. Even if the building doesn't collapse, stay away from the stairs. The stairs are a likely part of the building to be damaged. Even if the stairs are not collapsed by the earthquake, they may collapse later when overloaded by fleeing people. They should always be checked for safety, even when the rest of the building is not damaged.

8) Get Near the Outer Walls Of Buildings Or Outside Of Them If Possible - It is much better to be near the outside of the building rather than the interior. The farther inside you are from the outside perimeter of the building the greater the probability that your escape route will be blocked.

9) People inside of their vehicles are crushed when the road above falls in an earthquake and crushes their vehicles; which is exactly what happened with the slabs between the decks of the Nimitz Freeway. The victims of the San Francisco earthquake all stayed inside of their vehicles. They were all killed. They could have easily survived by getting out and sitting or lying next to their vehicles. Everyone killed would have survived if they had been able to get out of their cars and sit or lie next to them. All the crushed car s had voids 3 feet high next to them, except for the cars that had columns fall directly across them.

10) I discovered, while crawling inside of collapsed newspaper offices and other offices with a lot of paper, that paper does not compact. Large voids are found surrounding stacks of paper.

Spread the word and save someone's life... The Entire world is experiencing natural calamities so be prepared!

"We are but angels with one wing, it takes two to fly"

In 1996 we made a film, which proved my survival methodology to be correct. The Turkish Federal Government, City of Istanbul, University of Istanbul Case Production sand ARTI cooperated to film this practical, scientific test. We collapsed a school and a home with 20 mannequins inside. Ten mannequins did "duck and cover," and ten mannequins I used in my "triangle of life" survival method. After the simulated earthquake collapse we crawled through the rubble and entered the building to film and document the results. The film, in which I practiced my survival techniques under directly observable, scientific conditions , relevant to building collapse, showed there would have been zero percent survival for those doing duck and cover.

There would likely have been 100 percent survivability for people using my method of the "triangle of life." This film has been seen by millions of viewers on television in Turkey and the rest of Europe, and it was seen in the USA , Canada and Latin America on the TV program Real TV.


Wednesday, March 10, 2010

RIP Corey Haim


Los Angeles, California (CNN) -- Actor Corey Haim, who appeared in a number of movies during the 1980s, died early Wednesday of a possible drug overdose after being taken to a hospital, Los Angeles police said.

Haim, 38, was taken to Providence St. Joseph Medical Center in Burbank, California, where he was pronounced dead at about 3:30 a.m. PT Wednesday (6:30 a.m. ET), police Sgt. Frank Albarran said.

The death appears to be accidental, possibly an overdose, Albarran said.

Haim's most famous role was in the 1987 movie "The Lost Boys" in which he appeared with his frequent co-star, Corey Feldman.

Read The Rest on CNN

Everything You Did and Didn't Want to Know About Condoms

Last night I had the chance to go to New York’s Museum of Sex for Trojan’s launch of their new Fire and Ice condom, where I was greeted with cocktails, finger food, and more condoms than I could shake my stick at. The swag was nice, but actually I learned a lot about our rubbery friend. Here are the five most deserving of your attention.

1. A New And Wonderful Use For Vegetables
Among the many primitive condom materials over time, including animal intestines (ew) and metal (ow), there was once a penis sheath made out of a gourd. A gourd, I tell you! It might look like an elvish sword carrier, but Lord of the Rings fans beware! Stick with thine latex.


2. Put Down the Extra Larges And Back Away From the Counter

According to Trojan professionals Bruce Tetreault and Michael James Harris, there is no such thing as being “too big for a condom,” seeing as they hold up to nine gallons of water. So the next time your man wants to use his ego to avoid practicing safe sex, throw a nine-gallon condom water balloon in his face.

3. Stand And Deliver

Years ago, men overseas were having a ton of sex, but the military refused to give them condoms. Instead, they issued them “Pro-Kits.” What’s a Pro-Kit? A package with soap and directions for how to wash off your, uh, firearm. No wonder they still don’t want to be asking or telling when they’re still working to catch up with the gourd guys’ STD-prevention technology.

READ THE REST!!

The Hotel Del Appears on SNL

A picture San Diego's Hotel Del on Coronado Island ended a hilarious skit with Zach Galifianakis and Kristen Wiig. It was a classic word-repeating skit, the type where the more you refer to the word, the more funny it becomes. The word this time? Bidet. LOL, hell it's funny the first time!

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Osmond's Son Suicide Blamed on Mormonism and Being Gay


Specifically the fact that Mormons are deathly against homosexual activity and lifestyle. Apparently suicide is nothing new to the Mormon community and neither is prejudice against gay members of their church, family or stranger. Check out the stats and keep in mind Utah is over 71% Mormon:

According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC) the leading cause of death in America is heart disease, with suicide ranking eleventh. [1] Compare that with what the Utah Department of Health says. They report the leading cause of death for males between the ages of 15-44 as suicide. The Utah External Injury Data System says that from 1992 to 1999 there were 7,713 suicides alone. Eleven of those were between the ages of 0-9 years of age. [2] The rate of suicide in Utah for females between the ages of 15-44 is four times the national average.

Roseanne Barr has spoken out about this phenomenon recently. Indicating that the recent death of Marie Osmond's son was caused by him repeatedly begin told that his homosexuality was wrong and sinful. Apparently Marie Osmond also has a gay daughter? Save her!!!

Awkward French Anti-Smoking Add

From Nerve:




This ad’s caption translates as, “Smoking, it’s like being tobacco’s slave.” I get their point: the next time I light up, maybe I’ll think about how addictions are slavery, etc, and about all the industry fat cats I’m giving my money too.

However, with it’s weird overtones of rape, I can’t help but think that the anti-smoking lobbies are getting a bit desperate. Next time, why don’t they tell it how it really is? “Smoking, it’s like forced oral sex on a bespoke gentleman with very slender junk.” At least they don’t discriminate:



Remember How Jennifer Garner was in "Dude, Where's My Car?"


And so was the girl who played a bitch in like every teen rom-com and early 90's sitcom (most notably Stephanie's bully on Full House)...I rented this movie when I got this great sack of weed from a good friend's recent harvest. He crafted it for hilarity and said any silly movie I watch would be funny. So I got one of the silliest. Totally worked! Think I might actually get around to watching White Chicks....

Monday, March 8, 2010

Academy Awards 2010 Winners List


Best picture

"The Hurt Locker”

Actor

Jeff Bridges, "Crazy Heart"

Actress

Sandra Bullock, "The Blind Side"

Supporting actor

Christoph Waltz, "Inglourious Basterds”

Supporting actress

Mo'Nique, "Precious"

Director

Kathryn Bigelow, "The Hurt Locker"

Animated feature

"Up"

Original screenplay

"The Hurt Locker"

Adapted screenplay

"Precious”

Best foreign-language film

"El Secreto de Sus Ojos”

Best film editing

"The Hurt Locker"

Art direction

"Avatar"

Cinematography

"Avatar"

Costume design

"The Young Victoria"

Best documentary feature

"The Cove"

Documentary short

"Music by Prudence"

Makeup

"Star Trek”

Music (original score)

"Up"

Music (original song)

The Weary Kind (Theme from "Crazy Heart") from "Crazy Heart"

Short film, animated

"Logorama”

Short film, live action

"The New Tenants”

Sound editing

"The Hurt Locker"

Sound mixing

"The Hurt Locker"

Visual effects

"Avatar"

(See CNN List with Nominees Included)

Get It Straight: Our Founding Fathers WERE NOT CHRISTIANS


"I do not find in orthodox Christianity one redeeming feature." -Thomas Jefferson

"But how has it happened that millions of fables, tales, legends, have been blended with both Jewish and Christian revelation that have made them the most bloody religion that ever existed." -John Adams

"Religions are all alike - founded upon fables and mythologies." -Thomas Jefferson

State Reps and Anal Sex Don't Mix....


This is a hilarious entry from Savage Love on Nerve:
Nancy Elliott, a state representative in New Hampshire, wants to ban same-sex marriage in that state — where it’s been legal for less than three months — and here’s her reasoning: “We’re talking about taking the penis of one man and putting it in the rectum of another man and wiggling it around in excrement. And you have to think… would I allow that to be done to ME?”


(Picture is an anal sex public service add from 1951. What!?!? Read more about THAT here)
Author Dan Savage:
Where to begin? How about here…

If you’re wiggling your penis around in excrement when you’re having anal sex, Representative Elliott, you’re doing it wrong. You would think this would be obvious even to people who’ve never had anal sex, but apparently not. So let me break it down for you, Representative Elliott: you don’t have anal sex with an ass full of shit for the same reason you don’t have oral sex with a mouth full of food. It’s messy and no one wants a mess. (Except for the people who do want a mess, of course, but they’re a blessed rarity.) An empty, douched, and lubed anal cavity isn’t that much dirtier than an empty, flossed, and brushed oral cavity.

I will concede that excrement is for anal what Representative Elliott is for the New Hampshire State Legislature: a PR disaster. But excrement-free anal sex is easy. Make sure there’s some fiber in your diet, be regular, and only go for it when you’re empty — no anal during your butt menses! — and you’ll never get excrement on a single wigglin’ dick.

And now a question for you, Representative Elliott: Are you really sure you want to make it illegal for buttfuckers to get married?

“According to a 2005 survey conducted by the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention,” a commenter whom I’m going to quote at length (hey, Baconcat!) wrote on a blog in reaction to Elliott’s remarks: “forty percent of men and thirty-five percent of women between twenty-five and forty-four had engaged in heterosexual anal sex. Some studies put the incidence of anal sex in the heterosexual population as low as twenty-four percent and some as high as fifty-six percent. Averaging those numbers, let’s say thirty-eight-point-eight percent of heterosexuals engage in anal sex. Ninety-six percent of Americans are straight. There are 190,000,000 adults between the ages of eighteen and sixty-five in the United States, so that means 70,771,200 adults are engaging in heterosexual anal sex. Four percent of the adult population is gay, or 7,600,000 people. Roughly half — 3,800,000 — are gay males. Polls indicate that between fifty-five and eighty percent of gay males participate in anal sex. Taking the average — sixty-seven-point-five percent — that means the number of gay men having anal sex comes to 2,565,000.”


Math is hard, Representative Elliott, but see if you can’t wiggle this into your cranial cavity: 70,771,200 is more — a whole lot more — than 2,565,000. Anal sex in America is primarily a heterosexual pursuit. So if you really want to protect the sacred sanctity of marriage from the unholy taint of penises wiggling in rectums, Representative Elliott, you need to ban straight marriage first. (We needn’t protect marriage from lesbians, of course, because lesbians don’t have anuses.)

Friday, March 5, 2010

Reminder: The Oscars, On Sunday Nite


The 82nd Academy Awards on March 7th, 2010
on ABC
5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern
Oscars Website

Best Picture: Avatar, The Blind Side, District 9, An Education, The Hurt Locker, Inglourious Basterds, Precious, A Serious Man, Up, Up in the Air

Actor in a Leading Role: Jeff Bridges, George Clooney, Colin Firth, Morgan Freeman, Jeremy Renner

Actress in a Leading Role: Sandra Bullock, Helen Mirren, Carey Mulligan, Gabourey Sidibe, Meryl Streep

Directing: Avatar, The Hurt Locker, Inglourious Basterds, Up in the Air, Precious

Friday Night Liberty, Corporate America Done RIGHT


I loooove Pt. Loma's Liberty Station. They've managed to turn inevitable corporate America into a truly enjoyable serene experience. They turned a rundown spanish style mlitary complex into a really beautiful shopping, grocery, dining, art, dance, you name it place. With huge lush green open lawns, fountains, out door eating with FIRE PITS outside and so much to do, it makes me hopeful that maybe strip malls and parking lot oasis soulless shopping centers might go the way of Liberty Station. Wanna see if for yourself??

CHECK OUT FRIDAY NIGHT LIBERTY:
March 5th, 2010 - Starting at 5pm
Liberty Station

Friday Night Liberty is a monthly first-Friday evening of FREE open artist studios, galleries and events throughout NTC Promenade Arts & Cultural District. Free parking. Free Admission. The Freedom to explore, wander and enjoy our growing cultural campus.

Yelp! Drinks Week

Check Out Yelp! Drinks Week Online and then head out and get yo' cheap drank on!!
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Blue (Da Ba Dee) and other Lyrical Mistakes


Remember that effervescent 90's Euro pop techno jam by Eiffel 65 "Blue"? I thought it was a ballad about anorexia when it came out. NO LIE!

Actual Lyrics:
I'm blue, da ba de, da ba die
Da ba de, da ba die
Da ba de, da ba die
Da ba de, da ba die
ETC

Bloggers Take on Lyrics:
I'm Blue, if I eat, I will Die
If I eat I will die
If I eat I will die
ETC



I recently just had another lyrics snafu with the song "Replay" by Iyaz. And I just have to say, my version still made a tiny bit of sense ok?!

Actual Lyrics:

Shawty's like a melody in my head
That I can't keep out
Got me singin' like
Na na na na everyday
It's like my iPod stuck on replay, replay-ay-ay-ay

Bloggers Take on Lyrics:
Shawty's like a melody in my head
That I can't keep out
Got me singin' like
Na na na na everyday
Slap my eyeballs like a replay, replay-ay-ay-ay

Anti-Gay State Senator Busted After Visiting Gay Club


From NERVE:

Here’s your hypocrite of the day… or maybe of the year so far*: State Sen. Roy Ashburn (R-Calif.), who despises gays and lesbians and thinks they are not real people, was arrested last night after exiting a Sacramento gay club.

Of course, he wasn’t arrested for attending a known homosexual hangout (although I’m sure his cronies would love it if he introduced a bill banning such places), he was arrested for drunk driving.

In a state-issued vehicle.

The best part of all is contained herein:
Ashburn, a father of four, is a Republican Senator representing parts of Kern, Tulare and San Bernardino Counties with a history of opposing gay rights.

When the officer stopped the state-issued vehicle, the driver identified himself as Senator Ashburn. He was arrested without incident and charged with two misdemeanors: driving under the influence and driving with a blood alcohol level higher than .08% or higher.

A male passenger, who was not identified as a lawmaker, was also in the car but was not detained
. [CBS 13]

Thursday, March 4, 2010

2009 World Pole Dance Champion

And you thought pole dancing was skanky....You can see here that to be a champion is to be graceful, strong, fluid, incredibly flexible, athletic and of course sexy!!! This is just nuts!!

Why Are Accents So Sexy to American Women?










I don't know about you guys but most women I know are drawn like a moth to a flame to accents. Is this true for men? I don't know...Most notably, we love British accents (English, Welsh, Scottish, Etc.). We don't so much admire French or Italian accents I've noticed and Australian accents can go either way. I wonder if it's like a chemical or evolutionary thing or just a media inspired or cultural thing. Maybe our mothers passed down their rabid love for the Beatles or Hugh Grant or British Time Period pieces displaying dashing and valiant "knights in shining armor" are to blame. You could be a fucking homeless bum and if you have an accent, ima flirt whichoo!!

Christianity:


Def: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.

Def: A pyramid scheme based on a philosophy that was fairly progressive 2000 years ago. It has been rendered obsolete by modern scientific understanding largely due to its inability to resolve its inconsistencies through intelligently-applied critical thinking. It now serves as a means of deterring social and political advancement and as a tax on the gullible.

Read More Definition of Christianity at Urban Dictionary. com

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Free Ben and Jerry's Today!!


From Ben & Jerry's:
We're so proud of our favorite Maple Blondie, Hannah Teter, for bringing home the silver! Let's celebrate in true Ben & Jerry's fashion - For one day only on March 3rd (TODAY!), stop by your local participating Scoop Shop and say, "Way to go Hannah!" and you'll get a scoop of Hannah Teter's Maple Blondie for $1 - yup a buck, while supplies last! In case you forgot, it's Maple Ice Cream with a Maple Caramel Swirl and Blonde Brownie Chunks.

Jackie Chan Back with the new Karate Kid movie

Jackie Chan looks ANCIENT in The Karate Kid and this kid cute looks like he is 3 but I gotta say, I love Jackie Chan and he's still got moves and this kid can kick too. Plus the visuals of China look gorgeous and we all love a good coming of age kung fu flick right?

Washington D.C. Joins This Century, Allows Same Sex Marriage


New Hampshire, Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, Vermont, and Washington, D.C. are the only places in the US that allow same sex marriage (there's an Indian Tribe in Oregon that does too apparently). New York, Rhode Island and Maryland recognize same sex marriage but don't grant licenses. Still can't believe IOWA is down with marriage between humans but California isn't. Well, as open minded as a very few cities in this state are, we still have a shit ton of ridiculous close minded communities and Christian conservative influence to stop progress. We'll be ready next time!!

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Super El Camino, Little Italy: Fun Tuesday Nites!


If you haven't checked out the slightly older, classier hipster Super El Camino in Little Italy, do so! It is housed where The Airport Lounge used to be and is HUGE! It's bigger and swankier than it's South Park counterpart and has less of the "passe skinny jean wearing/bike adoring/still wearing plugs/faux vegan" South Park vibe. On Tuesday nights you can get 1/2 Price taco platters, 24 oz. Tecate's are only $4 and starting at 9 pm they have KARAOKE!! Sounds like a hoppin' Tuesday night!!

Truly an Odd Couple: Andy Samberg and Joanna Newsom


Andy Samberg is a 31 Year Old SNL goofball, very funny at times (Check Out Flags of the World Below!). Joanna Newsom is an ultra indie harp playing folk singer with the voice of a 4 year old. Together they are a couple of over 2 years. Nuts!!

Remember Jonah Hill was in I Heart Huckabee's??

Yea he toats was, he quit his job making boxes (?) to be in his first movie I Heart Huckabee's. He was Bret, a member of the family that adopted the tall African man. There was a scene when Albert Markovski (Jason Schwartzmen) and Tommy Corn (Mark Wahlberg) ate dinner with that family and things got a little awkward. Remember?


Albert Markovski: No, I'm not. I'm talking about not covering every square inch with houses and strip malls until you can't remember what happens when you stand in a meadow at dusk.
Bret: What happens in the meadow at dusk?
Albert Markovski: Everything.
Mrs. Hooten: Nothing.
Albert Markovski: Everything.
Mrs. Hooten: Nothing.
Albert Markovski: It's beautiful.
Tommy Corn: It's beautiful.

(And incidentally a meadow at dusk is one of the most powerful things experienced, if you're lucky enough to realize what you're seeing.)

Monday, March 1, 2010

SNL: Very Hilarious Digital Short

I'm not a regular SNL watcher anymore but god damn they make some pretty funny stuff every now and then. This is comedic gold here!! You gotta watch it many times, it's jam packed with funniness. It's Monday, get your laugh on and spread it around!

Best Chocolate Chip Cookies: Albertson's


You gotta believe me on this. They were taste tasted by my entire ex- office (30 people) who unanimously believed they were the best choco chip cookies they'd tasted. That is pretty significant. I found them at the Albertson's in Barrio Logan on 14th and Market. They were in the bakery section in a purple bag and they were fresh baked. Please try them and let me know what you think, they were glorious, perfect in every way.

Fashion Week Spotlight: Chris Benz

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Most of the Fashion Week Shows this season were BLACK, everywhere, taking a more serious tone on design and clothing. One of the few collections to showcase color and lighter cuts was my favorite collection by Chris Benz. Check out the shows of different designers on the NY Times Website.

Deadly Irony


....Really, really fast and generally NOT stopping....